A child with ADHD will struggle with object permanence.
Object permanence refers to child’s (or adult’s) ability to know that objects continue to exist even though they can no longer be seen or heard.
Have you ever looked for your phone and discover it in your hand?
Or lost your car in the mall parking lot?
These are all relatable examples of a lack of object permanence. Even though ADHD has very obvious diagnostic symptoms, object permanence is often missed because it can sometimes be viewed as “forgetfulness”, when in reality it is actually the brains inability to recognise object permanence.
I live in a home where when something is placed down or left lying somewhere, I need to make a mental note of where it is so that when that individual is looking for it again I can tell them where it is. This also applies to email notifications, messages that need replying to, bills that are due, people who live far away. The saying “Out of sight, out of mind” is quite literally how a person with ADHD exists.
In our home we call it the “ooh shiny” effect. You’re busy doing something, you have to go to the bathroom or you leave your task to fetch something and then “ooh shiny” something else grabs your attention and the task you were busy with just vanishes from your mind.
We often give these people a hard time about them being late, not honouring promises or always loosing their stuff, but reality is quite different. It’s not something that they can control. It is, quite simply, their brain that struggles with executive function.
So how do I help my child overcome this deficit?
Use a timer for tasks
Get a kitchen timer for tasks like getting dressed, homework (broken up into chunks), screen time, chores etc. Don’t use a phone timer as the ADHD brain requires something visual counting down to work effectively and a phone will lead to more distraction.
Teach executive function skills
Here is great info graphic from https://proactiveapproaches.co.uk/an-introductory-guide-to-executive-function-skills/ that explains executive function.
Don’t put it down, put it away.
A great mantra to teach your kids, when they come home they don’t just toss the bag down and leave their shoes in the car. Have a place for everything and “don’t put it down, put it away” in it’s place. Then things are in a predictable place every time you need them again.
In the end, it takes a bit of effort and energy to implement these things, Occupational Therapy and Cognitive Training can assist in developing the skills needed to overcome these challenges.
