“In an autistic home when things are working, don’t change anything, don’t move anything, in fact, don’t even breathe!”
This is how I feel about moving into 2025.
I see a lot of American and British accounts across my socials and I always wonder what it feels like to just be “in the middle of a school year over the change of years?”. Here in the southern hemisphere, our year is a calendar year. Our school year starts in January and ends in December. So when we start a new school year, it is after our summer holidays, Christmas and New Year. Our kids have had 6 weeks off school and their previous grade is behind them. A New Year is a little bit more significant for us because it really IS a new year in all respects. We are getting ready for our kids to go back to school, to their new grade, new teachers, new schedules and this, after a 6 week break from it all.
If you have neurodivergent kids you can appreciate the challenge of having so many “new things” happening at the same time makes for an interesting start to the brand, spanking new year.
Over our summer holidays my kids made friends with the kids in our street, and it’s been a chaotic, fun filled month of kids in and out the house, bicycles on the front porch, running out of glasses and many a wet swimming towel strewn around the house. My boys have absolutely loved it. We’ve had a flash back to the 80’s when I grew up in our neighborhood with bikes and friends and staying out till the street lights came on. It’s been a beautiful summer.
My boys have grown up over the last month, gaining independence and confidence to make new friends, navigate new friendships and become more self sufficient in their daily routine. We have made some new friends and braaied* and kuiered** over the summer. This is the first time in 10 years that we have been able to do this type of thing, and I am grateful and shocked that I have learned to let go a little. Allowing my kids to navigate new friendships without strict play date times, to allow them the freedom to ride their bikes, skateboards and scooters in the street responsibly and to trust them to be home when we ask and to be safe. It has taken a lot of trust in other parents to know how to handle my boys, but in the end, the differences in our families have brought an element of maturing in my boys, they have tried new foods, met new pets, visited in other peoples homes without me being there to make sure everyone behaves, not one of the parents have said they are hooligans so I can only assume that they behave themselves. Left to their own devices they have learned how to skateboard fearlessly, watching their friends has shown them that fear is not as big as they thought it was and that they can try new things and not have to like it.
If you follow me on Instagram, you would have seen a few posts during the holidays and you would have seen how much fun they had.
Moving into the week before school starts, we have started to go back to a more regular routine, bed times and meal times in preparation for next week. My eldest is going to Grade 5 and my youngest is going to Grade 2. Both significant shifts for them, and I know they are going to fly in their new grades.
*South African Barbeque
**Afrikaans word for gathered/communed/visited – in a very social and relaxed manner.
