If you had asked me this time last year what I would be doing with my life, I would have hoped to have had a positive answer about my future and my creative work. The truth is I was at a very low point this time last year, and being a “heart on my sleeve” kind of person, it wasn’t difficult to notice.
I started a journey of faith around this time 2024 and I made a lot of lifestyle changes as I took steps towards a more Christ centered life. Over the months of connection with believers and building trust with church leaders, I reached a place of beautiful healing and renewed trust in my new Church as an institution. No false pretenses, no fake relationships, just honest, open and vulnerable conversations from their side and mine.
Fast forward to April 2025.
Being the parent of a child with Autism (even though it’s only level 1) is challenging and exhausting on every level. High Functioning alludes to it being “easier to handle” but the truth is it’s only a milder bundle of different characteristics and co-occurring disorders and requires “less support” than a high support needs or profound Autistic child. In our case we have Sensory Processing Disorder as well as a Pathological Demand Avoidance profile co-existing with Autism level 1 (previously known as Asperger’s).
In my faith walk I felt a shift inside myself, a discontent with my life and my career in social media management, so I decided to fast social media for lent. Not something I think I’ve ever done in my life, fast for lent, I even had to Google lent to make sure it was an actual thing and not just something I’d seen on social media.
The irony of seeing lent and fasting for lent on social media and then fasting social media is quite amusing.
In my time of fasting, I still had a few clients that I was managing social media for, and I was very disciplined to only be online when doing their work and then logging off for a phone free life for 30 days. It took a bit of getting used to but my mind cleared from the fast pace of socials and I started to see holes in my life and my parenting. By the end of the fast I had come to the decision to close my social media business and trust God for a perfect place that I could fit in and be fullfilled and feel useful. Which was counterintuitive to the fact that our bills were pilling up and business for both my husband and I was slow, but trust in the Lord I must. He is the only one who can bring the best and open doors where there seems to be no door at all.
I was approached by my children’s school and was presented with an opportunity to work for them. I immediately said yes. I had complete peace in my heart when the idea was pitched, that I had no doubt in my mind. I haven’t worked a “day job” in 10 years, I didn’t even hesitate, I just said yes and when do i start? I started 2 weeks later and all I can say is it’s been a ride. Getting used to a work day and working with amazing people who work with kids who needs extra help with their school. I never in a million years thought I’d end up smack in the middle of a world that I have been researching, advocating and fighting for with my own kids for years. It took a bit of adjusting the home routines to fit the fact that I was now out of the house every day from 07h30 – 13h30. My parents have been such a blessing during the transition time and have picked up a lot of the day to day slack that I would miss while being at work.
I remember in church one Sunday a friend said to me that my voice and my passion for my kids and the way I advocate for them would be heard, and I couldn’t believe it, months later, here it was coming to pass! It hasn’t been a smooth road, emotionally adjusting to new routine after 10 years out of working from home and being my own boss, managing the change in mental load has been invigorating and I feel like I’m using all of brain for the first time in years. Working at the school hasn’t changed the fact that the bills keep piling up, but it has done wonders for my own self esteem and confidence in my skills. This was more of a personal upliftment than a financial bail out and that is much more than I ever thought I deserved. My husband says I have become a lot more vibrant and “myself” since I started working again, and that makes me so happy.
I would never have chosen working as a school administrator, but God clearly knew it was the perfect spot for me. I work with such a phenomenal group of teachers that are passionate about helping kids overcome their learning challenges, and the vibe is one of positivity and high energy.
All I can say is that God knows exactly what we need, and despite our frustration and plan making, if we let go of our own plans and allow Him the space to talk to us, we will find ourselves in a very different position to the one we thought we would be in. It wasn’t a “holy moment” it was a change of heart and a change of mind, allowing myself the chance to stand back and see my life from a different perspective, His perspective, and the view was very different to what I imagined.
